Week Ten

Family Work

One of the discussions that really hit home for me this week was about how work has been redefined over the past 2 or 300 years. This was not something that I had really thought about before, but I now believe that this transition has had a huge impact on families. Up until the industrial revolution, work was something that families did together. Now it has become individualized, has taken the father away from the home, the definition and purpose of work has become income, and there has been a gender division in labor.

The article that we read in preparation can be found at http://magazine.byu.edu/?act=view&a=151. I would recommend it! 

The article that we read impacted me very much. It made so much sense, and yet I had never connected the changes and struggles that families have to work. So what am I going to do differently in my family now that I am aware of this? It made me commit to share as much of the work in my household as possible. I want it to become something that I and my children find rewarding, not be seen as a punishment. I think that the social aspect of work has virtually disappeared in many cases (in ours, it has become ‘divide and conquer’), and that is something that I would like to make a priority in my household. I have noticed that some of my fondest memories are times that my family has worked together towards a common cause, and allowed for fun and interaction in the meantime. 

Another topic that we covered this week was Fatherhood. For one of our assignments, we had to research some things that successful fathers do, and write a paper about it. I didn't know that Fatherhood was such a well researched topic! There is a lot of guidance that has resulted, and I wanted to share some of the examples that I found. 

Rosenberg and Wilcox compiled a list of seven ways that fathers influence their children in critical ways that is published by the U.S. Government’s Child Welfare program. I would like to touch on five of those points.

· Relationship with Mother: Rosenberg and Wilcox’s article states that, “children who witness affectionate, respectful, and sacrificial behavior on the part of their father are more likely to treat their own, future spouses in a similar fashion” (2006). The article goes on to explain that the example set by their father in this role as husband will likely play into the future health and happiness of their children as they form their own relationships, as well as relieve them of negative consequences that marital discord between their parents may bring. The truth that “the most important thing a father can do for his daughter is to love her mother,” was also taught by Elaine Dalton in a recent Conference address (2011).

· Unique ability to Discipline: Wilcox and Rosenberg (2006) state that, “the role that fathers play as disciplinarians cannot be underestimated.” They go on to say that fathers are uniquely successful in disciplining boys, and contribute to the overall success of discipline by sharing the load with the mother.

· Spending Time with Children: According to Dr. Canfield, the Founder and President of the National Center for Fathering, as well as many LDS commercials, family love is best communicated through time spent together (Wilcox & Rosenberg, 2006). The Child Welfare article (2006) explains that this is for three reasons: it allows him to get to know his child, he will tend to become better at child caring, and the child will feel more loved. Fathers specifically are in a great position to help a child develop a sense of exploration and how to keep feelings of aggression in check (Wilcox & Rosenberg, 2006). Some studies even show that a father’s involvement in education can be more important for academic success than their mothers (Wilcox & Rosenberg, 2006).

· Guide to the Outside World: Fathers play an important function in the lives of their children by encouraging them to learn about and explore the outside world while providing them with the safety and guidance that they need to do so (Wilcox & Rosenberg, 2006). Wilcox and Rosenberg (2006) show how this role is vital at every stage of a child’s development, from toddler to adolescent. They conclude by saying that fathers can prepare their children to meet the challenges and opportunities of adulthood by gradually helping them to act independently.

· Protecting and Providing: By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families (Hinckley, 1995). Wilcox and Rosenberg (2006) support this statement by explaining that a father who provides financially for his family and are aware of and involved in their social environment helps his children to feel safe and secure, and tend to have better relationships with their children.

References

Dalton, E. (2011, October). The church of jesus christ of latter-day saintshrist. Retrieved from http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2011/10/love-her-mother

Hinckley, G. B. (1995, 9 23). The church of jesus christ of latter-day saints. Retrieved from http://www.lds.org/family/proclamation?lang=eng

Wilcox, W., & Rosenberg, J. (2006). The importance of fathers in the healthy development of children. Retrieved from http://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/usermanuals/fatherhood/chapterfour.cfm